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Should I Let The Balls Fall Where They May?

I’m at a crossroads in my life. I think, I have been here for a while. I know I told all of you who follow me, I had a new job as the Activity Director. I worked years in this same facility as a Nursing Assistant. I enjoyed being there as a Nursing Assistant in the beginning and the middle of the job. The job just got repetitive, I caught myself not giving my all as a Nursing Aid and did not enjoy the feeling of being half-assed!

The Activity Director

Has a lot of responsibilities. Truthfully, I don’t know if I’m pulling my own weight…

Last Saturday, My husband and I drove two of our residents, and a bus full of other olympians who  belonged to another company. We drove to P-town for State Bowling Competition. They asked if they could hitch a ride on our bus. We left around 7:00am and we should have left earlier. I had forgotten to check the gas tank the night before and we were on empty. My husband took a wrong exit to find a gas station. We ended up going around in a circle, and started back from square one. The time is now 7:25am and we are just leaving S-town, the town where we are from. We had to be on the lanes ready to go by 9:00am. We strolled in at 8:40am and the lady from the company who hitched a ride said she was going to run in and register her athletes. I gathered every one-off the bus as quick as I could. A man from the other company came and grabbed the ramps they needed for their olympians. I got both of my residents into the bowling alley and on their lanes. My husband parked the bus, and grabbed the two ramps we would need. I went to registration, registration started from 8:00am – 9:00am. The time, now is 8:55am. I barely made the deadline. I was headed back to their lanes, when a volunteer came up to me, and said: “both of my athletes need name tags.” I stuck my hand into the registration envelope pulled them out and walked as fast as my chubby self would carry me sideways through the crowd. I slapped them on my athletes. Then the lady who hitched a ride with us informs me my residents needed their ramps set up. I had yet to set up ramps at all in this job position. I asked her as opening ceremony was going on if she thought I could use the ramps of the opposing athletes? She said “Shelley, you will have to ask them, where are our other ramps?” I told her they were up front, and I don’t think I have time to set them up. She said “GO GET THEM” my husband took off running to do as she said and we ALL helped put them together, and put them on their lanes. I don’t know what time I had everything together, however I do know it was a close call. I also know these two people saved my ass.

I still have to take all these ramps back to the bowling alley. I felt I owed this woman a favor for saving my ass! I told her we had bowling on my calendar for Tuesday, Tuesday being yesterday. I called the bowling alley to find out their hours have changed. They would not be open until 4:00Pm. I get off at 4:30PM and the residents eat around 5:00. The ramps didn’t make their way to the bowling alley yesterday.

Today my son is coughing.

My husband stayed home yesterday to be with him, now its my turn. I was working yesterday, maybe I should have taken the ramps back after 4PM. I had a choir coming in to perform for my residents around 7:00pm. I’m going to go into work, tonight to take back the ramps when my husband gets home. The reason being is because tomorrow we take twelve residents to go shopping. We leave at 10am the ramps take up two seats on the bus. I’m thinking they need to be out of the bus before we go grocery shopping. My luck we won’t be able to cram everyone into the 15 seats we have on the bus. I have my assistant, and two volunteers going tomorrow.

Whomever this letter concerns,

I have a calendar full of activities this month. One being a Christmas party with residents and their families. I feel the pressure is on. They also have a New Years eve party which is in this same month. I’m not for sure I like this feeling, I don’t know though if I’m just not used to working this hard? I don’t know, if its to physical for me because I’m a chub. I do know I have seen other chubby people doing the job. I have always had trouble focussing, and this job is all focus and organization. I wonder though if I’m lacking help or perhaps the job has to many things going on for two people to handle?

This is where YOU come in. I’m asking you guys, I guess since I’m asking you can let me have it!!!

27 thoughts on “Should I Let The Balls Fall Where They May?

  1. Life leads us all to many crossroads. Sometimes we have to examine all our options on the direction we want to go. We can look at the other road and see what it might offer or we can examine the road were on and see if we need to make some significant changes in order to make it worth staying on. Either way it sounds like change of some kind is in your future. Keep your head up and keep moving in the direction that brings you peace.

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    1. I hear 👂 what you’re saying. I wish change was easy, especially changes to ourselves. Physically and mentally. Thank you, for you kind comment, and dropping by my blog.

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  2. Hi Shelie 🙂 Figured I would stop by and catch up since I saw you in the neighborhood (thanks for stopping by by the way 🙂 )
    Wow! you have a lot on your plate lady lol. I was exhausted just reading about your day!
    I think based on what you were saying here, perhaps maybe you are overthinking it. When you start something new like this and especially when it’s a big change from what you’re used to, I think it’s important to cut yourself a bit of slack.
    It sounds to me like that was quite the workload for one person however but at the same time there is always a learning curve with this sort of thing.
    To put it in perspective, my husband worked the same job for 12 years until one day enough was enough. He took on a whole new job and like you lots of running around and a need to be highly focused and organized. he’s a super energetic guy and a borderline workaholic.
    Ultimately that job certainly required more help than he had as he was thrown to the wolves in my opinion BUT it got him out of that mundane, going to go insane job he had before and it proved to him that he could in fact leave a job he had for 12 years and hated and that there was life beyond all that. But it’s scary making that leap.
    The job was short lived and he moved on to another job and he’s much, much happier now. I compare jobs to relationships.
    Sometimes we stay comfortably miserable in one and finally get out, then we have a rebound and then we typically find the right one. I am not saying that’s the case for you but I will say just go with your gut. I know it’s not as easy as picking up and leaving a job but I would say at this point just take a deep breath and allow things to unfold naturally and maybe don’t be so hard on yourself 😉 lol trust me you will know what you need to do if and when the time comes.Sometimes we arenot meant to be in one place for long and sometimes we are but trust me you will know 🙂 ❤

    P.S sorry for such a long comment lol

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    1. Don’t be sorry, I enjoy a long comment. I agree about everything being a learning curve. I learned Saturday how to set up a Bowling Ramp, I also learned I need to leave sooner than later. I have had significant changes in the last two years. I may be wrong but the good Lord definitely has my eyebrow raised. I felt lead to write my whole day out, and see where the post would land, even if the post was to vent or be reassured. Thank you, for your comforting words. FYI: I like your videos lengthy. You’re down-to-earth it’s a breath of fresh air!

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      1. Aww thanks Shelie! 🙂 lol it’s really hard to keep them short so maybe I shouldn’t worry about that so much and just make the videos the way I want! That’s right I said it lol I worry too much sometimes about what other people think but being myself seems to be working lately so thank you for reminding me of that! 🙂 ❤

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  3. Before you even finished the post I could tell that there definitely is too much to handle. One can only do the best job, if they have all the resources they need… and you need more hands to help. So in order for you to be able to withstand the stress and pressure.. and even enjoy your work, ‘ask’ for more help.
    If it’s not forthcoming, perhaps you need to explore other opportunities even if it will be difficult to leave the place you’ve been for so long…. So my dear, take a deep breath, realize your worth… and your limitations to do the impossible! Diane xx

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  4. Grace, give yourself grace to learn something new and don’t be afraid to ask for help. You have a big, beautiful heart, Shelie and your residents are certainly blessed by you.

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  5. I don’t know in fairness. I left not due to physical challenge but finally just lacking the stitchings to keep me together. Health always worrisome yet bang on time. Hopeful though it didn’t quite seem to be more than a cashback scheme of 5% return har har sarcasm energy. Thus as the bummer luck hit of hopefuls hopeless my job not remaining a growth forward I kinda broke. I had no trouble with ideas. I never grew up celebrating any holiday save pig out on thanksgiving. I’m not craft oriented but not without notions. I also many times had the joy of unexpected plop! Yes it’s bible study! So let’s drop off the religiously sensitive! Inappropriate residents hours or yada like my own fails which just becomes a rare similar substitution ;). I can not count the fails there – however, 4.5 years there its was a joy to fail better til new adventure got me. (Cart pushing and gas station ooo 😉 yet another state love! (So seemingly hopeless aw boo this instant but the point is bad luck like good luck comes and the rigidity! Of solid planning fail safes backups etc lol it’s part of the soul fast so take heart and if you didn’t stay may adventure find ya! And if you do? Yay there too

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    1. We celebrated but not like this, and I never had to plan a party! I try to live a simple life at home. I can say now that I’ve planned a party, though. This job has is definitely an adventure!

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      1. I can relate yet oddly I didn’t threaten to quit there daily like pettier employ. It just is an emotional commitment that stinks if the results are not quite mesmerizing… like my garden. Mine. You know it’s the rezzies! But I planted that year chards to radishes turn soul with more drain sand for the puddle spot… ahhhh even the B.B. sized radishes bolted! It couldn’t have been more shoddy if I had purpose tried for shoddy! I’d do it again unless duh the management insisted on actual competance. ;). I guess I should say fairly I was allowed to fail and grow but no there too were lines I dared not expect they budge even if I could say those lines didn’t exist but just for me. In that way I enjoyed more successes and the tears of failure ran off fast. Oily me ;). If i use the measure of simplistic things I fail forward too! 😉 good! But I don’t wake up with 516 mg/dL fasting sugars no lid for coffee just missed the bus and the cabs slow… that’s not even what got me! ( note the point was that burn outbe wary of it. Rest. All hopes will go plop. Nature of that job! Smile and that pray your page lists… thank god even for the bad days! – rewarding isn 53 minutes bipolar temper trantrums! But know 😛 I am not backing up. The answer still is no!!)

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